The Man I am

There's a strongly entreched perception about being a man in the streets of my social circle. To prove your manhood, you must 'live with your girlfriend'. This perception might be valid in many ways because it is the norm of mankind to evolve through family. What this perception has failed to consider is the preparation that come with 'living with your girlfriend' to prove your manhood. Basic human needs such as shelter,food, security and clothing should be taken into consideration when deciding to live with your girlfriend. As the man that I am I have found myself to be rather scattered and a bit inconfident to put into effect the perception.
My past experience has shown me i'm still immature to take care of anyone whom i might consider 'my girlfriend'. I'm still interested in boyish charms such as dating a very beautiful lass in town, and having wild sex without the consideration of settling down. Although, I have doubt of achieving such a superficial ideal because I have not realised it yet, I wonder how will I know to settle down if haven't achieved the ideal.
Recently, I was engaging in a very bad habit that, if found by potential lovers, will harm every chance of making my relationship dream come true. I have repeatedly had sex with prostitutes. This practice I condemn because I see no moral value in it. As the man that I am, I'm rehabilitating myself from engaging in this bad thing. While in this renewal of self, I will relentlessly persue the dream girl through unusual means which might have been condemned. That is trying to impress her with my style of fashion. The attempt to use queen's language very fluently and, unusual of me, project confidence. In addition to my social dilemma, i have come to understand that people have a way of reaching a conclusion. Last time I touched the good stuff, some guys thought I am a regular smoker. And incidentally I kissed a gay guy. Now everyone who heard or saw me think i'm gay but I saw that kiss as a convinient way of showing that people can do stuff just to cause as a stir and entertain not to say I'm gay. I'm a straight guy with abudant sexual desires. I have come out of those misdeeds strong and having learnt to do when people around you are quick to judge. These are some of engagement I would never see myself in ever
My objectives which I have vowed to see through are personally motivated for me to risk the idea of living with a girlfriend. As a human being, I have found my decision economically selfish ambitions which I have subjected myself to bearing the consequences than conforming.
The man that I am is only human who can be fallible but really trying hard to find sustaineble solutions.